Let It Go

There is something about music that speaks to my heart and in December,  I found myself surprised at how the lyrics to songs in a children’s movie could affect me. I have since bought the soundtrack and once again I am astounded at how much I can identify with this character’s words. She sings, “oh, I’m such a fool, I can’t be free. No escape from the storm inside of me. I can’t control the curse. Oh oh you’ll only make it worse. There’s so much fear. You’re not safe here.” As I hear her struggle I sense this feeling deep inside my chest. A stirring that what she sings is the way I have lived my life. To be the good girl I had to be…to conceal and not feel…and the storm just raged from the inside out. The absolute miracle is that Jesus saw what I was going to do. He knew the storm that would brew inside. He knows every thought. He knows every tear. He died for me anyways. Because of His death and the fact that He lives, I can face the outward storms of life and I can even face the very difficult storm inside my heart and head. The feeling that I cannot escape the curse…This thorn…The fears of letting people in…letting them love me…The pain of knowing God sees and knows the real me…learning to let Him just simply love me has been the source of panic and joy all at the same time. Yet, as I learn to let it go…to embrace myself right down to every fault, I begin to die to myself and let Christ do what He came for. It is in my weakness that He shines through. He has the power to break the chains. He has the power to calm the storm. There is a song that is playing through my head like a beautiful broken record…”I’ll never be the same. No, I’ll never be the same. Cause I know, that you’re alive. You came to fix my broken life. I sing to glorify your holy name, Jesus Christ.”
May everything I do be all for you, dear Lord. May I reflect your light everywhere I go. May my life song glorify You. Thank you, precious Jesus. Amen.